The Apple Mouse - a white chunk on my desk that sits next to my trusty MacBook Pro. It looks wonderful - the white back to the glass top and the aluminum finish on the back.

And I want to replace it immediately.

First, take a look at the mouse:


OK, you can admit now. It’s not ergonomic. Sure, it has that nice Apple logo certifying that you’re an actual Apple shill, sure, it has that nice glass top and that shiny aluminum finish - I mean, it’s an architectural wonder -

Just shut up for a second. Who cares about the aesthetics? I don’t care if my mouse is some crappy HP or Dell mice way back in the 2000s that’s been fished out of a dumpster. If it’s comfortable to hold, then so be it! I can use an alcohol swab to get rid of the previous inhabitant’s dirt and grime and use it happily.

And since 2015, Apple made a courage bold decision to remove removable batteries and introduced the Lightning port on the mouse. Which is fine, except for one teensy thing. It’s on the bottom of the mouse.

OK, Apple, just one second. How am I supposed to use my mouse - when it’s charging?!

The designers and engineers at Apple will have their statement ready by now. Oh, it’s actually a feature, not a bug! We don’t want our users compromising our beautiful aesthetics by having a tail coming out of our Magic Rat, so…

Yes, and stroking on the back of the said rat to scroll downwards feel like rubbing my fingers against a hard surface. My fingers will start to blister and hurt, and eventually my fingernail will try and break away from the clutches of my finger.

I can tell you, straight in the eye, that a cheap generic mouse from some random company in China is 100000% better than the Apple Mouse in every which way.

Because when you’re doing software development, nobody gives two damns about the aesthetics. It’s all usability and feature sets - and how the mouse shouldn’t give you RSI to compensate for it.

And thanks to Apple’s ridiculous $69 price tag on this thing, I’ll have to use this until it meets its grave to justify my purchase. Thanks a lot, Apple.